Take a Pause

If you’re outraged by someone else’s personal choices, you should probably take a social media break.

Americans spend tremendous time and energy on controversies that affect very few—if any—actual people. For example:

• Trans athletes in collegiate sports – There are likely fewer than 10 trans athletes in all of collegiate sports. The colleges can manage this.
• School curriculum controversies – Specific books or teaching topics spark nationwide fury, though these decisions are made locally and affect a tiny percentage of students.
• Celebrity political statements – A famous person’s opinion triggers widespread outrage despite having minimal policy impact.
• Holiday cup designs – The annual “war on Christmas” coffee cup debate consumes attention while affecting no one’s actual life.
• Campus policies at elite universities – Speaker invitations or student group rules at schools attended by 0.1% of students somehow become national crises.
• Drag queen story hours – These optional events at select libraries generate massive outrage despite being entirely voluntary and affecting an infinitesimally small number of communities.
• Plastic straw bans – The debate over these environmental measures has consumed vastly more energy than their actual impact on either the environment or consumer convenience.
• Gender-neutral toy aisles – The reorganization of children’s toys in a handful of stores somehow becomes framed as a fundamental threat to society.

If you don’t like these things, don’t participate.

What’s really happening here? These outrage cycles aren’t accidents. It’s our brain in crisis over a social media outrage cycle—stuck in a vicious cycle. And/or it’s being deliberately engineered by political operatives from both parties who benefit from division, or by foreign troll farms designed to sow discord in our society. The algorithms amplify the most inflammatory content because anger equals engagement.

Don’t be manipulated. When you feel that surge of righteous anger about someone else’s life choices, recognize it as the hook it is. Take a step back. Close the app. Go for a walk. Talk to a neighbor. Read a book. Or focus on a bigger issue that actually will make the world a better place. Volunteer to help people in your community or help a friend.

Your mental health—and our collective well-being—will thank you. And I thank you.